NPD Anthology 2002
Peace in our Time
by Ted Slade
Last week he'd have shot you with never a blink,
or ordered his squaddies to die for the Queen,
but now he's a regular chap like the rest of us
who'll put down his pints like the best of us -
no more rounds in the breech, just rounds at the bar,
for it's off with the scrambled egg, on with the flute,
Lieutenant Kije is being demobbed.
He went off to war, his pack full of battenberg,
now he's back and the cake's all eaten.
The tales that they told us of our hero's doings
we'll hear for ourselves, and more to be sure,
especially the ones about killing the nips,
or the best way to barbecue horses,
now Lieutenant Kije is leaving the forces.
So here's to the health of all of the Kije's,
and all of the others in khaki and blue
who are coming back home, turning guns
into butter and swords into ploughshares,
it's the end of hostilities, a world without war
(now where have we heard that story before?).
Is Lieutenant Kije really not needed?